You see me today with a beard and payos, a hat and jacket, standing and davening with Kavanah. Surely you think that I was always like this. But no, I was once totally different... I'd like to share with you about a period of my life that I am less proud of. At the time I was barely religious. For two years I barely opened a sefer, not even a siddur. I didn't daven. I didn't learn. Nothing. No Teffilin, no benching. Nothing spiritual had any meaning to me. I used to sleep whenever I wanted to. I had no structure to my day. Sometimes I would be up till late at night, and then I would sleep most of the morning. And don't ask about Shabbos and Yom Tov. Most people go to shul, learn, grow. Me? Nothing. I would stay up maybe just for the meal. Even the High Holidays didn't move me. I didn't hear Shofar or go to Kol Nidrei. I wore colored clothing and had a pony tail, without a kippah. I would waste my days with stupid, meaningless activities. I hung out with all types of friends who looked just like me. And I didn't share my feelings with anyone. With my father I barely spoke. My mother used to shower me with love, but I didn't speak much even to her. So you are surely wondering, "Nu, so what changed?" I grew up. I was only two years old then.
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